This post was written in mid-October for my Aunt Marilyn's blog. I thought in only right to share it here in case you missed it.
Fall has historically been my favorite season. And this
week, the DC metro area is experiencing the most gorgeous fall weather a girl
could ask for. The trees are starting to change colors and there is a crisp
breeze causing all the leaves to rustle joyously. But what really gets me is
the smell; the smell of changing seasons is indescribable and intoxicating.
I find that there is a stirring in my heart; a nostalgic joy
that has been long lost is awakening in my soul. It is brought on by crunchy
leaves, bright orange pumpkins, delicious apples, and that familiar and comfortable
atmosphere of Fall that I know so well.
But every crunch of a leaf, flash of orange from a pumpkin,
and juicy bite of an apple reminds me of the season I have left behind.
The last two years of my life were spent on the tiny island
of Singapore. This island is a bustling city nestled in Southeast Asia between
Malaysia and Indonesia; rich in jungle atmosphere, cultural diversity, and the
best food known to man. Though 6 weeks have already passed since I moved back
to America, a piece of my heart still dwells with that little island. I long
for the sticky, hot air and the smell of jungle and city, combined with a hint
of durian.
I wonder when I will again feel that tropical atmosphere, eat
chicken rice at the local hawker stall, or be the only white face crammed into
a train car packed with Asian faces.
As I am experiencing the joy I have always found in changing
seasons, my heart is being torn in two as I grieve what I have left behind. Some
mornings when I wake up, the Singapore-shaped hole in my heart is almost too
much to bear. I tell myself that I would trade the gorgeous Fall weather any
day to be back on that tiny island.
But the grief will inevitably fade, and the joy of Fall will
once again take over. And I will move forward into my new season, as we are all
forced to do at times, but I do so having left a piece of my heart in Singapore
and treasuring the piece of Singapore left in my heart.
